Take a shower

 This morning, right after waking up, took a shower. 

Then I felt much better, more normal, unlike yesterday when I almost felt like I was close to having an anxiety attack.

I feel like my head is clearer now. This morning I was thinking that maybe I am ready now to continue this friendship since I now realize how much ego I had which caused my over sensitive feelings. But then as of now, I am thinking that I would not do any effort anymore to nurture it, and I’ll just be passive. I mean, I won’t be initiating anything but I will acknowledge if I get asked first. Yeah, this makes me feel better rather than getting hung up with regret and wishing that it never started at all. Fate meant us to cross paths to teach me something and I think I have learned a few things already. 

It’s amazing how my mind can make up stories and convinced me that it could be true. I laughed at myself in realizing how ridiculous I was to come up with such an impossible scenario. Who do I think I am that I’d have such a power? I’m just an ordinary, forgettable person. How vain of me to think I could have a strong effect on someone. Nope.

So that’s it, I will just let this fizzle out since I can’t undo what I’ve started already. Let’s see.